Oh, Give Her A Cadac Please! Poem by Margaret Kollmer

This was an entry in a competition for a Cadac braai (barbecue) which Les, my late husband, and me worked on together...entering the final product in his name............

'Funny how much Marg (my wife) and Cadac have in common. They're both fast and efficient, easy to use, portable, well designed and long lasting! However, Marg I've got - a Cadac I've not.

Now the braai that I need is a portable job
And preferably one that's on wheels
For Marg must carry the table and chairs;
Ask more than that and she squeals.

She takes such an age creeping round on all fours
Looking for dry bits of wood
A Cadac, of course, would save her the fag
And the rest would do her good.

'Tis singing she is and her smile's always sweet
As she scratches around for those twigs
But surely I'm wrong, aren't the words of her song
On the subject of chauvinist pigs? (Impossible)

She even lacks flair for coaxing a flame
I've watched her resorting to bellows
If only she'd listen, and b-l-o-w like I say
Ahem! ....I'm one of those practical fellows.

From my comfortable chair I instruct her
On the right way to set up a braai
She tries hard it's true but what can one do....
Would a man go to pieces and cry?

You'll have gathered that I am a tolerant chap
And I would like poor Marg off her knees
Like Cadac she's proved she's one of the best
So give her a Cadac....please! '

(And yes, a supa dupa Cadac braai won us first prize. What fun!)