Shy Bri ….[ The ‘other' Me; Fantasy; Shyness To The Extreme? ; Humor; Long; Growing To Adulthood] Poem by Bri Edwards

Some of you think you know me well,
but I doubt you do. Now I will tell …
‘the way it is'.
My life that is, specifically that I AM shy ….,
almost since I was "Just a Twinkle in my Dad's Eye".

Even my fetal brain thought: "I don't want out.
I don't want to go where I hear others scream and shout.
I like it here, all alone, all by myself. I DO.
‘If it ain't broke, don't fix it'. That's very true.
Please, if anyone is listening, I think I'm TOO SHY ….
to enter the unknown world. Do I have to? WHY? "

[When they ‘did' the ultrasound, I covered my "private parts". What DID they want to know? If I had too many hearts? ! "]
Yes, I was THAT shy.

But, apparently No One listened, OR no one cared,
‘cause months later I heard "Mrs. Edwards, are you prepared? "
And then Mom's response: "Doc, get this over RIGHT Away! ".
AND THEN "my home-for-nine-months" began to sway.

But I heard Doc say (hours later) : "Forceps. Get THOSE! "
And next thing I knew, something cold clamped onto my nose!
Well, "the water" had "broken", I was not feeling swell,
so I decided to not resist. They yanked. I fell …….
out of Mom.

I was shy. I kept my eyelids tightly-closed, against the light;
I'd never had them open. I didn't even know WHAT WAS …."sight".
But I found out soon enough, when Doc gave my butt a slap.
My eyes opened to a brand new, busy world. I was NOT hap-
py! !

And I was SHY. If I could have spoken, I'd have said:
"Cover me, please. I'm cold and covered with wet and red",
but the Real Reason I thought "cover me" was: I WAS SHY!
I've learned since then that most newborns AREN'T. Tell me, Why?

I at first was too shy to "take" my mother's breast,
but soon enough I learned Mom's milk was "The Best".
I could have drunk for hours but Mom soon ran out,
at which point, if I hadn't been So Shy, I'd have let out a shout.

Diapers! ? I didn't need them for nine months straight!
I didn't want them now, but Mom and Dad thought they were great.
STILL, I only let my diaper be changed twice a week,
by which time each of my diapers would severely REEK!
But I was VERY SHY!

Oh! The camera. Who made such a ghastly invention?
Click, click, click. I KNOW my shyness I did mention,
but STILL they aimed that thing at me Night and Day,
while I ate, slept, cried, laughed, did ‘work' or play.

Yes, "work"! Did you think it was easy to learn …
to focus my eyes, endure the noise, AND twist AND turn? ?

"Bath time". Yuck! yuck! Imagine my mood!
Yank the clothes off I'd gotten used to. I think that was RUDE!
Couldn't they at least give me privacy? I guess Hell No!
They had to see AND touch me from my head to EACH toe!

Oil here and powder there. Run a comb through my hair.
But enough about my infancy! ! It was rough; I swear.
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Parents think "the Terrible Twos" is hard (for them) . I'll tell you what.
For me it was like ‘first time on golf course, having to sink a putt ….from twenty feet'!
And whatever I did was watched and closely scrutinized.
If YOU aren't a shy person, like me, you'd be surprised …
how anxiety-provoking it was for ‘SHY BRI'.
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Fast-forward ….WAY FORWARD. Try "college". You bet!
[I'd had some counseling while in high school. I got upset …..
that the psychologistS could (for my shyness) NOT find a cure! ]
Imagine: I arrived at my freshman dorm and was told: "You're..
out of luck, we are sorry to say. No private rooms available ……today."

And so it was I roomed with an extrovert …no less!
At least he was polite and well-spoken. His name was Wes.
It was very difficult, but I told him how shy I was.
So if I was undressing, Wes would look away ‘cause …
he respected me and my "condition".

I was lucky. Very lucky. The next three years I spent …
living with Wes in a two bedroom apartment …I did rent.
And, of course going to classes where I was forced to speak …
in front of fellow students. I did ok, but my voice was weak.

Wes had a girlfriend, Patti, and she was very nice too.
I kind of envied Wes, and finally asked what I could do ….
to meet a girl, maybe someone shy like me. Patti said "I'll see …
what I can do."

That's how I met Joyce. For "looks" she wasn't my first choice,
but, gee, she was GREAT! And shy. She too had a weak voice.
Our two weak voices spent hours talking to one another,
but (remembering each other's shyness) we tried to not smother the other.

After we graduated, we married. Ten years already!
We have twins, a girl Sonya, and a red-haired boy, Freddy.
Sonya is a bundle of energy and so Out-Going!
But Freddy is like his dad, Bri; his shyness is always showing.
……
We're working on it.

(October 19, 2016)