On a grimmest evening...
Salty breeze was blowing...
Cacophony of birdcall was provoking...
That aroma;
Which was coming from your hair...
As if you are everywhere that exists...
The oceans between us...
Anguished claspings of hands...
But silences that remained...
Downcastly gazing at your foot...
Underneath my legs sand was creeping gently...
Everything that carries me to you...
Symphony of that tides took us with them...
Deep;
Descends...
To that skysill;
To that wee ships...
To those beautiful isles...
But i couldn't move...
And you are going to the horizon...
Suddenly, you're vanished in the gleam...
And a cigarette burned my fingers...! ! !
A well written verse! Try to make it more objective so the viewers might see their stories in yours! Evoked that sense again of the cigarette! Loved it!
And nothing but time is what makes a fantastic poem like this. In the magic land of dreams, you are enjoying with your lass till the cigar burns the finger. Good man! I really liked it!
Nice. Very visual. Read my deadpan sociopath. Reminds me similar. This is great.
Beautiful poem.I must say you have a beautiful imagery of thoughts.The way you describe the nature surrounding your love is excellent. The feeling in your hearts in such a beautiful atmosphere is evolving in this poem.i liked this poem very much.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Beautiful poem, through and through. As Akshaya proclaimed, it's like a day dream. Lovely write, Utsav. Lovely write. Cassandra J.