Will You Ever Think Of Repenting? Poem by RoseAnn V. Shawiak

Will you ever even think of repenting for what you have
done to my heart?

Talking, telling all your secrets, laughing and joking
with me, flirting incessantly, enticing me with your
so-call unconditional love.

Making me fall in love with you, although I tried so
hard not to, not really playing hard to get, just afraid
of loving you, afraid you meant nothing of what you said.

Wanting me, telling me you loved me at first, then as time
wore on, being unmindful, treating me passively with abuse,
still saying you loved me, but I sensed it reluctantly.

Lately telling me how much you want to be alone, telling
me you will call or come back, leaving and not coming back
until the next evening or days later.

Your love has never really been unconditional, you have
so many strings attached to it, just to keep me loving you
only while you did what you wanted.

Putting me further away from you, shattering this heart
cruelly without a thought of how you were making me feel,
subconsciously wanting me to feel your pain, I think.

Still continuing talking and loving you, heart breaking
within, knowing you will never return to me the love I
have given you totally and freely.

Because in fact, you were just trying to get through loss
in your life and took advantage of my heart's genuine
love and compassion.

It has been years now since we parted, yet I still have a
place for you in my heart, knowing that the way things
turned out was the only way that it could, for you were
too into yourself and never saw the value in me.