swetha vankayalapati

As If Poem by swetha vankayalapati

in streets of tears, darkness as trees,
in graves lie dreams, agony rustles
as there comes a serein,
thy always brought up a rosarin!

He sews gossamers of hues
with sun rays as needles,
on every rose leaf to another,
to bathe and flux in leaf greens!

'gliding gliding in pools of
rushing rushing on gossamers,
swirling swirling in honey,
not an interlude I land
here shaking hand with an ant,
touching backs of glow worms! '

By now tired, look up for delicious night;
He sits on the crescent moon
filling voids of hunger by music
of bloating stars at his finger tips!

Of no residence, every hook I rejoice
in conveyance, He use no corner to sermonize,
carry my senses through his sight
encircling distances despite!

in quiver, its warmth upto brims
rolling down as I breathe,
a mere time enclosed between
percolating water drops,
flapping wings.......
......only tears pure of joy
short for a while!

Submitted: Friday, July 06, 2012
Edited: Saturday, July 07, 2012

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Comments about this poem (As If by swetha vankayalapati )

  • Gold Star - 12,234 Points Ramesh Rai (6/30/2013 7:35:00 AM)

    i agree with Hans n bro Romeo / keep writing (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 125 Points Romeo Della Valle (7/26/2012 8:53:00 PM)

    I also think that this well penned write is thought provoking with rich imagery! I really enjoyed and I can tell you honestly, it is amazing! 10+++ A great entrance into the Poetry World! Thank you for sharing and keep inspiring the World with more! God Bless You! Romeo-New; York City! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 9 Points Nontobeko Dlamini (7/16/2012 8:10:00 AM)

    The rich use of metaphor and a little simile created these unique original images. The repetition in the third stanza moves the poem along. It rise and falls magicaly like a story line, sure dreams do. Its a masterpiece! (Report) Reply

  • Bronze Star - 2,344 Points Hans Vr (7/14/2012 8:19:00 PM)

    Not easy to interpret fast but I see it as a wonderful voyage in the dreams of a person who is elevated from his suffering by daring to imagine wonderful things at the time of sunset, and who shares his flight of ideas with you.
    Even without understanding the true story behind the poem, it is a pleasure to read the wonderful images you paint in this surreal masterpiece. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 34,472 Points Frank James Ryan Jr...fjr (7/14/2012 4:03:00 AM)

    Broad-range imagescape and an abstractive storyline of intrigue highlights this fine verse ~FjR~ (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 93 Points Payal Parande (7/13/2012 12:01:00 PM)

    its beautiful as i always say i am no expert and not even good as you....but it is so beautiful..

    i just lost myself in
    every movement you described
    feeling like i am living it live...

    ..thank you so much for this wonderful piece of
    art......love, payal (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Anele The_african_son Potelwa (umbhali_wasembo) (7/13/2012 10:34:00 AM)

    Great concept am not suprised, the words glide their own unique light, the creation of a vision within ones state of thinking is derived from every line of spontaneous writting of such, i am filled with above par zeal to have read these write, after quite a while not being around, great way to feed my thoughts and emotions, wonder!

    The_African_Son (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Oludipe Oyin Samuel (7/13/2012 8:42:00 AM)

    a brilliant mesh of words with a stylistic concept. Weldone. It's a good one (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 5 Points Dr Syed Anwar Yarkhan Jilani (7/12/2012 11:27:00 AM)

    I am old and old fashioned. Fly wild in unfathomable space. Flapping wings. Well done. Nice. (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,092 Points Unwritten Soul (7/12/2012 5:36:00 AM)

    This is amazing write, the picture you shaped really beautiful..with the words selection, it just amazing...feel calm as if the dark calm i still warm like there is no harm...beautiful poem! keep it up_unwritten Soul (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Subrat Pradhan Love-immortal (7/12/2012 5:13:00 AM)

    Hi! u r good at words. vocabulary strong. imagery good. But don't you think too much of imagery kills the central theme. Try mine. Bye S.P. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 40 Points Indira Babbellapati (7/12/2012 1:38:00 AM)

    may you be blessed with more imagination and endless creativity! (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,393 Points Elena Sandu (7/11/2012 6:41:00 PM)

    Brilliant! Beautiful written, I could guess the huge happiness of one special moment of infinite unity. Those moments we feel one with the Universe. If my guess is correct, then I wonder have you written it out of memory or being in that state. Thank you for share, loved your poem! (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,842 Points Babatunde Aremu (7/11/2012 7:36:00 AM)

    This poem is full of imageries. I like the rhyme and the flow. Great write (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Khushi Throne (7/9/2012 3:41:00 PM)

    nice words to deep explanation......! ! ! (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 7,521 Points Neela Nath (7/8/2012 5:05:00 AM)

    Very nice word play. In a word-praiseworthy. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 12,234 Points Ramesh Rai (7/7/2012 11:33:00 PM)

    xlent imagination, nice compose. always keep writing. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 347 Points Danny Draper (7/7/2012 10:58:00 PM)

    Interesting language and very descriptive. Not familiar with serenin and rosarin and it may have assisted to define these words in the Notes section to enhance the readers understanding.  (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 3,193 Points Valerie Dohren (7/7/2012 1:44:00 PM)

    Very good imagery used here - great write. (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 3,022 Points Wahab Abdul (7/7/2012 12:38:00 PM)

    in post modern poetry old english is not encouraged... otherwise the poem is good (Report) Reply

Read all 23 comments »

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