intoxicated by your memory
my vision blurs
my breathing is quickened
my stomach floats and
my hands tremble
as images of you pass
my minds eye.
when I imagine a touch
I know the real thing would kill me.
2. Every cliche about drunkenness in one poem, with a few regular cliches to boot ('mind's eye' is a particularly bad one.) Rule of thumb: If you've heard a phrase more than twice, it is likely a cliche. Even twice is pushing it.)
Puts me to mind of someone I once passionately loved. So yes it makes me feel.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
It's good, but there is something that it needs, just not sure what it is.