the fountain railing holds back
the children from a pool of
water that has a siren's call
the children want to play inside, under.
the pool is certain death.
in my minds eye,
i see the fountain without the rail
8. The first part is great. Sustain those concrete, original images. 'Mind's eye' is cliched.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
It's good but I think the words could use a little reworking.