The Handbag Of No Return Poem by Annette Aitken
The Handbag Of No Return
The Handbag of No Return
Enter at your peril.
One day I took a peek inside
the lost and found, that had to hide
the makeup bag and perfume stand
the emery board to keep in hand
the cotton buds to clean your ears
the bacterial wipes to kill all germs
the polish to put on your toes
the tissues used to blow your nose
the bar of chocolate that's half eaten
the sticky sweet without its wrapping
the chewing gum has got no clothes on
the sewing kit without a purpose
the lipstick laying without its lid
the long lost keys, no holes to fit
the hairbrush filled with hairs and clips
the rubber bands, in case you need them
the dental floss to keep your teeth clean
the tenna lady in case of leakage
the spare pair of pants, for just in case of
the train ticket with nowhere to go
the one legged sunglasses, with no use at all
the battery there to make something work
the deodorant can with only one spray left
the long-lost earring without a back
the five pence piece stuck down the crack
the broken pen that lives in the corner
the sticky plaster lived there even longer
In the pocket hid away, a pack of painkillers to ease your head
I turned around, Gasp! ! ! what did I see?
The KITCHEN SINK staring back at me.
Hahahahaha....humorous..Great poem about simple things. Still smiling.
You need no lessons in writing, young lady! This is rally superb and had me in stitches. Are you sure it's a handbag and not Tardis? I think my biggest crime when I was young was to keep a slightly bitten into salt shortbread in my pocket for about six months. I was visiting my Aunt who had a big house in Pencaitland, just south of Edinburgh, and she produced these awful biscuits for Tea-time. I managed to distract her attention and slip one into my pocket. handbags are sacrosanctbut I'd love to delve into a few! This is not only very funny but good poetry too. It's going into my favourite poems list. Maybe one day I'll buy one and see how many items I can stuff into it! Tom
So true ! Lladies handbag can be stuffed like any thing to meet different emergencies.Such a lovely write! Enjoyed reading.
At the end, the last line make me burst of laughing....it is a cheerful and humorous poem :) Thanks Annette
favorite lines so far: the chewing gum has got no clothes on the sewing kit without a purpose and the broken pen that lives in the corner the sticky plaster lived there even longer 'laying' should be 'lying'...........a common error i think. the tenna lady incase of leakage..................i'm afraid to ask! ! ! ! pants or panties aka nickers? ? the deodorant can with only one spray left......i got a little laugh from this one. i never use deodorant (anymore) ! but i shower once a day.............even if i don't need it. i too enjoyed the last line very much...........even though it should read staring. [for starring******: star stär/ verb gerund or present participle: ..........................*******starring 1. (of a movie, play, or other show) have (someone) as a principal performer. a film starring Liza Minnelli (of a performer) have a principal role in a movie, play, or other show. McQueen had starred in such epics as The Magnificent Seven (of a person) perform brilliantly or prominently in a particular endeavor or event. Vitt starred at third base for the Detroit Tigers 2. decorate or cover with star-shaped marks or objects. thick grass starred with flowers mark (something) for special notice or recommendation with an asterisk or other star-shaped symbol. the activities listed below are starred according to their fitness ratings - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - to MyPoemList only? one time i peeked into a woman's purse: to see if she really was taking The Pill. they were there, but i was so inexperienced that i don't think we needed any! bri :) :)
All sorts for sure, that is what we have. Such a beautiful handbag too. Great humour.
The long lost keys! ! Thanks for sharing this poem with us.
Oh yes, that bottomless pit, the abyss with the insatiable hunger for more, more more, loved the fresh humor.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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4/30/2024 11:08:31 PM # 1.0.0.1119
Wonderfully amusing poem, sounds like your handbag is like Doctor Who's Tardis.