Z-A Lavish Vile Experimentation (What I Was To Him…) Poem by Kristy Artmann

Object of wonder and mystery…
I peer towards you without you knowing…..
I concoct my plan of attack….

Carefully ever so carefully…..

I get close to you and study your weaknesses so that I may weaken you even more in other areas….
Oh let me probe at your insides.....tug at your soul....disable your spirit.... segment your well being.....slice your pride then stitch you with false love….

I enjoy lifting you up, playing with your mind, throwing your heart to the ground after I tear it to shreds…

I need to break you…
I need to hurt you…
I need to play with your emotions 'til I am satisfied and get my fill of thrills that boost my ego and self esteem….
I want to make you feel loved and unwanted at the same time….

Yes my butterfly it was all an experiment to me…to see what I could do…to see what you’d take and how much your heart would break….

And that because of me....
How many tears your eyes could make.....
How fast you’d fall for my lies over and over again....
How badly you wanted me by looking into your eyes…

Yes butterfly I lied to your face not only to deceive you but to abuse you…
Abuse the love you had developed…
The experimentation of developing false love built upon the betrayal I dealt you…
The thrills were worth your pain I caused you…..

Sweet butterfly with broken wings….
I miss you so much…
I didn’t want to let you go but you flew away…
How I loved to hurt you….

Come back to me so that I can yet again start the cycle over…
My ego and self esteem needs you….
Oh come back for my next experimentation…..
More torture I have in store for you….

***This was wrote as if it is him saying this about me; it's my take on the situation although he DID admit he played with me on purpose to see how I'd react***

~Kristy C. Artmann~ © 2007