abhimanyu kumar.s

Rookie - 40 Points (31.12.1988 / venkatgiri kota)

A Need I Need

For instance, I open my doors
Give you reasons for why
Why I need you
No measure for stances
No measure for reasons
I be in her stances
Working with circumstances.

I halt in dark, with
Pursuing the darkness of your light
You are a need as the space
The space between you and me.

I get cold in summer
In the absence of you for
Which I need you
I ask you for your living
The living in my living
Compare nothing, for instance
The birth of you
And death of mine.

Submitted: Sunday, September 11, 2011

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Comments about this poem (A Need I Need by abhimanyu kumar.s )

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  • Rookie grame peele (11/3/2011 4:34:00 AM)

    you are a need as the space, the space between you and me! what a piece very good. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Jacqui Broad (10/8/2011 7:14:00 AM)

    Heartfelt love declaration? If you ask a girl's hand in marriage with this sweet poem, she'd say yes, for sure. Your living become my living. Till death do us part... (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 1,048 Points Bernard Snyder (9/28/2011 10:04:00 AM)

    'I be in her stances, working with circumstances'(what a line) ! ! Very nice poem Mr.Kumar! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Ovidd (9/24/2011 9:00:00 PM)

    I think there is passion here and it can be felt.

    I think the the rhyme is over-done in the first stanza. Odd, because I feel pretty guilty of this myself. You should think about this too ('ances') . Be careful of cliche's - not saying this is true here, but be cognizant of it.

    The third stanza - well I am no better, often do the same, but that does not make it better.

    Good Luck!

    http: //www.poemhunter.com/ovidd-bcw/ (Report) Reply

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