Being Awakened. Poem by Fay Slimm

Being Awakened.

Rating: 4.9


Heavy with deepest deep sleep
He feels the layers begin to unzip
And strip off, one by awakening one.
Aware now of the movements of feet
In an unwary way, he starts a hazy
Ascent, driven mistily upward towards
Light of day, but sleep wants to stay.

Bleary eyed, he knows he is
Leaving dreams half done, and
Mistily wonders what battle he'd won
As he stood, naked and red in the sun.

Body departing now from sphere of
Virtual reality, he awakes to the
Utter confusion of real, with wavering
Limbs now still, he unwillingly opens
Sleep-heavy lids, to see standing
Before him, in night-attired row
His wonderful wide-eyed kids, who
Wobbling beween them an over-filled
Breakfast tray, and all in accord,
Shouting a loud 'Happy Father's Day'
Just as they'd previously planned.

But they'd watched an amazing often unseen
Act of miraculous awakening from coffin
Of sleep, albeit wrought without tact.
Dreams now gone, he joins the fun and laughs.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Lynda Robson 27 October 2008

A very vivid descriptive poem Fay, a bit like me in the morning, hope he had a good Fathers Day, 10 Lynda xx

0 0 Reply
Kevin Wells 27 October 2008

Been here and tried to write about it myself but nowhere near as eruditely as this! How come you know so much about me?

0 0 Reply
Tom Balch 27 October 2008

To sleep per chance to dream,10+++++++++++++ regards Tom

0 0 Reply
Vincent James Turner 06 November 2008

Whenever I read your work Fay, I get the sense that you are very much in tune with the world, your choice of words and subtly placed rhyme work wonders, they gently carry the reader through the poem. It’s nice to see a tribute poem to a father, as they although fundamental in a Childs life are often overlooked. Your title is also apt. How this one comes did about? is it based on an actual experience, or have you drawn from your feelings. Either way this works on many levels and you should take great pride in your ability to connect with the reader, and portray evocative thoughts without coming over all flashy. Best wishes Vincent

0 0 Reply
Ency Bearis 05 November 2008

a great poem..nice vivid write to fathers and children..A10 Ency Bearis

0 0 Reply
Marvin Brato 04 November 2008

Children are the encouragement and joy a fathers.

0 0 Reply

It is so wonderful how children are they pick and choose who they mostly love and fathers is usually the number ones in their lifes. Its a great poem Please when you get a chance read some of my poems especially the ones called: Everyone turns away and All my life Thank you and God bless

0 0 Reply
Sandra Fowler 28 October 2008

What a fortunate man to have children who love him so much. A lovely, positive write. Ten. As always, Sandra

0 0 Reply
READ THIS POEM IN OTHER LANGUAGES
Fay Slimm

Fay Slimm

in Cornwall U.K.
Close
Error Success