Valerie Dohren

Silver Star - 4,029 Points (13 January 1947 / Southport)

Eclipse - Poem by Valerie Dohren

Whilst gazing up towards the sky
I saw a wondrous sight
For in the beauteous heavens above
The day turned into night

The moon was dancing with the sun
Fixed in a long embrace -
A lovely courtship had begun
Up there in silent space

Suspended high in dark display
As one, entwined in love
Against the black and sombre sky
Their backdropp set above

They kissed so long and tenderly
Wrapped in a sweet romance -
Before my eyes they ballet`d in
A graceful cosmic dance

The darkened skies then set a scene
A truly splendid thing
As from their heav`nly union shone
A shimm`ring diamond ring

The daylight then returned in full
As, slow, they moved apart
Their marriage thus surrendered to
Reveal the sun`s bright heart


Comments about Eclipse by Valerie Dohren

  • Gold Star - 16,990 Points * Sunprincess * (10/17/2012 8:37:00 PM)

    very picturesque..love this one.. :) (Report) Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • Rookie - 33 Points Mark Dillon (7/28/2012 9:53:00 AM)

    Supernova, lovey description and verse. (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 3,205 Points Hans Vr (7/20/2012 9:43:00 PM)

    A masterpiece, Valerie. Superb. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 391 Points Joseph Anderson (7/18/2012 3:41:00 PM)

    If you have not, please submit your poetry for publication. It is certainly worthy. I believe it would
    sell, very well (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,284 Points Tarobinson1103@gmail.com Robinson (7/16/2012 6:36:00 PM)

    I'll always think of this poem every.time I witness an eclipse. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 2 Points eloida Capuno (7/16/2012 11:36:00 AM)

    lovely! nice flow of words and imagery. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 415 Points Captain Cur (7/16/2012 8:58:00 AM)

    Awesome, poem of the century, I'm not talking 16th here.
    Although this is the type of poem that will survive through
    the centuries. Great, great write! (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 7,720 Points Neela Nath (7/15/2012 10:05:00 AM)

    I'm just speechless and spellbound.The cosmic dance of words is hypnotic. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie John Scully (7/15/2012 8:20:00 AM)

    Beautiful words, especially the line, 'The moon was dancing with the sun'. Great poem. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 63 Points Eric Cockrell (7/14/2012 10:55:00 PM)

    you write the most beautiful poems! (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 4,107 Points Diane Hine (7/14/2012 8:52:00 PM)

    Fabulous Val- memorable. I love the image of the diamond ring as a sliver of sun comes into view. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Heather Wilson (7/14/2012 3:08:00 PM)

    A really beautiful description of an eclipse Val, so well written, a pleasure to read. (Report) Reply

Read all 12 comments »




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Poem Submitted: Saturday, July 14, 2012

Poem Edited: Sunday, August 12, 2012


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