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Joe Rosochacki

The Ballad of Marshmallow, Tevye, and Goose

Marshmallow, nicknamed ‘the pony’,
was the malevolent maternal mastermind equine of the trio,
Who planned the break-out,
Tevye and Goose, nicknamed ‘the boys’, were of couple of smart asses,
- - donkeys literally
The trio escaped from the ‘pen’
The trio were fugitives, wanting to get outside of their confines
They didn’t use a hack saw, hammer and chisel like men in prison
But rather the sun was the complicit one, by its heat, took the water out of the fence
That would later undermine the integrity of the wood that was used,
The combination of drought, with Marshmallow’s itching,
Led to the failure of the fence
Through Marshmallows obsessive scratching
- -her bum and the dry wood, the fence broke eventually,
Emancipating, though by not proclamation, the trio through a ‘fencing’ operation.
The sentry dogs, Millie and Miranda, were barking “Uh-Oh”,
The wrangling ‘posse’ of one, my wife Judy,
- -ventured out on foot to find these ‘fugitives’,
Before they were featured on “AMERICA’S MOST WANTED”
Judy ‘collard’ Marshmallow, who was feasting on hay, partying down with other horses, and having a grand old time
She had to prove to herself that this flea bitten color 21 year-old Pony was not an Old Grey Mare,
- - who was sung, and till is, by children.
But the ‘dangerous’ donkey duo remained at large.
They were on the lam, - - -no, not that lamb,
“Mary had a little lamb” …but that’s a different story
A ‘bola’ was sent out by use of a sign that Judy
a ‘Wanted’ poster outside of the premises
They were “On the road again”,
- -no –not the song by Wille Nelson, …literally,
They stood in the middle of road and was spotted by a passerby,
The person or persons phoned the authorities to capture them
They sent no SWAT teams because there wasn’t any fly in a horse trailer,
Back to the Sheriff’s department in Sulphur Springs in Hopkins County, Texas
BUSTED and ARRESTED, allegorically they were nailed to the walls.
Because they are too big to nail on one wall
If they had mug shots or if they were hoof-printed there’s no way to tell
Did they their DNA extracted? (Donkey Nucleic Acid)
They didn’t care, they aren’t going on the Maury Show,
‘Who Be the Daddy’ episodes,
As far as donkey paternity because they were both ‘fixed’—castrated
They had no chain and no balls.
Anyway, the duo spent some time in ‘lock-up’ stock yard
For they were big to be put in a jail cell.
Anyway their fines was set at $260, $130 per donkey,
My wife went ape.
The fine was begrudgingly paid by us,
Now the trio is back at home planning their next escape.


Submitted: Tuesday, August 06, 2013
Edited: Monday, September 02, 2013

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

This is a true story which occurred 4 days ago. Although it was slightly embellished.

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