'The Nightingale Sang Too Early' Poem by ajith patnaik
'The Nightingale Sang Too Early'
(this poem provides a right mesage which respects the fact that 'u should wait for the right time to strike')
a nightingale sang too early
it thought the shiny blanket of snow
to be the petals of jasmine
the sound coming through the caves
when the cool wind blows through
sounded like the horn
marking the beginning of the spring
forget did the nightingale
about the sorrows of winter
the tears that matter in the shiny eyes of hers
she forgot the grief of staying alone and still
the memories of flocking together
made her heart beat a few times more and
pump blood a few drops more
and sing the song a few seconds more
she sang, she flew inspite of all the dew
eventhough she couldnt fly
eventhough no one stood by
moments passed, mountains covered
but the exhaust and the pain
of the chill and the thoughts
dried the oil in her heart
and she dropped down with pain
she realised the soundness of the word 'PATIENCE'
she realised that she should wait
for the time which is right
for us to come out of dark
and return to light
nice work and youy have put some effort into it its way better than my peoms :) 10++++++++++++++++++++
This is very good writing Ajith. Thank you for asking me to comment. Firstly may I suggest that you leave out the opening sentence you offer by way of explanation. You don't need it. The poem speaks very clearly. And I'd change the title too - I'd call it 'The Nightingale Sang too Early'. It's a much more lyrical title for a poem with an uplifting moral theme as well as an interesting and original harmonic structure. I look forward to reading more of your poetry. You have quite a gift. Love, Allie ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
she forgot the grief of staying alone and still the memories of flocking together made her heart beat a few times more and pump blood a few drops more this is fantastic! ! ! I love it! ! sometimes the hardest thing is to wait. well done. *Crystal Midnight*
May the waiting is fruitful and thus will not abuse the right to wait.Nice writes Ajith.
A philosophical creation, inspiring to read, it certainly alerts our selves to the certain point of veiw that you have chosen to convey!
Ajith This is a poem of beauty and philosophy. Than you.....Karin Anderson
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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5/4/2024 3:40:02 PM # 1.0.0.1119
Right to wait and strike, This is a secret lesson of life................. Good Work.............