Sunday, March 5, 2006
A Dream Of Her Concern Comments
Rating: ★4.0
I've lost my place
inside of this dream
where I am walking
along a dark road
...
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12/6/2025 12:49:03 AM # 1.0.0
hi Lisa, i think these could be two separate poems. the ending, with the daughter and mother, is far more interesting and it takes the poem a long time wading through scenic descriptions to get there. a shorter piece, expanding on this scene with the mother and daughter would make a powerful piece indeed. good writing overall.