Despair Poem by Iris Mista

And then I wake up, feeling the burning pain
I have to live with it, never to be the same
Grateful for any brief moment of relief
it will change even more, so I want to believe

Hold on to all what seems to be light
any enlightenment in the struggle I fight
How could I think, hope, it can be taken away
for the past, the brokenness, always will stay

But the sky, the wind, the rain and the sun
the earth I walk on, no matter what I've done
it is not only for you, but it also is mine
raindrops on my face and the sun to shine

I have the right to be here just as well
it is not only for those who created my hell
I have the right to enjoy woods and sea
God granted me this place on earth to be

That is how I want to live from now
in pureness and simplicity, I will learn how
Being thankful for what this earth has to give
that tiny little spot, my place, where I can live

I know, it is no more than a prayer of desire
so deeply longing for all I can not hire
For all that seems to be given from above
I need a heart, pure, warm, full of love

Sunshine in my heart, to melt the cold stone
love for life so I can endure being so alone
Raindrops to wash the hurt and pain away
never ending peace in my soul to stay….

It is asked too much, I am fully aware
how can I ask, how do I even dare
For life is pain and all the pain is life
only a heart of stone does not strive

God, I beg you just once more
let me live life what it is meant for
Teach me my burdens to accept
dig me up, from the deepest depth

I tried so hard and did my very best
to sing a song of purity, in serene rest
But as a matter of fact it is all not true
still searching, so alone, to find life's avenue

September 11,2013