“healing Has Become A Process” Poem by Lisa Visor

“Healing has become a process”
I couldn’t hold her stare
because my guilt got in the way
She was who I wanted to spend my life with
But somehow I had ruined that
I had given way to vulnerability
had become a thief
of all that had been innocent
Bad decisions had raped my reason
And I was a lifetime away
from being in her arms again
I’d sought out passion
but found despair
Losing everything
and finding it all again
Now I play deaf to the sound of my recent lover’s calls
Trying to wish her away in my slumber
And I wonder so desperately
If we can move away from this agony
her with me by her side again
The awkwardness that has become of us
Trying to pull away from her grief
and healing has become a process