Post-Breakup In The 21st Century Poem by Lauren Beasley

And every time I hear my phone buzz,
I secretly hope it's you.
And 100 'likes' but none from you
might as well be one or two.
I still check my chat every once in a while,
just to see if you're online.
Wondering who you're up talking to,
when that face you're lookin at ain't mine.
And every time I hear a similar voice,
my heart skips a beat.
And when I see you in the distance,
my face can't hide the heat.
Every time I see you post online,
my chest pounds with anxiety.
I hope my posts do the same to you,
though that might be impropriety
I search your name but never follow,
just to see what you've updated.
Yet I expect you to like and comment
though most of your words I've hated.
And every time I hear a metal song,
I feel slightly sick inside.
And all the things you introduced me to
are ruined by my pride.
Even still, when this boy is texting me,
I wish it were my former boo.
I can't call anyone else my angel,
cause that title was always just for you.
A notification, and I feel
my subconscious hope begin to rise.
It'll never be from whom I want it to be,
still I look with wishful eyes.
A buzz, a beep, a bell, a boing
- remind me I'm not over us.
I'm tired of wishing you still acted friendly,
when all I do is fuss.
And every time I listen to Lullabye,
I'm reminded of you-know-who.
Sweet memories used to lull me to sleep,
now I stay up missing you.
You'll update your status,
perhaps it's something I should like.
Maybe if you see my name,
in your chest you'll feel a strike.
Sometimes I remember the hurt
and your name brings up the hatefulness.
Other times I reflect on sweet moments and
my heart somehow fills with gratefulness.
And every time I hear my phone buzz,
I secretly hope it's you.
Please just like my silly post;
I really hope you do.