Rejection - Poem by Gabriel Moreno
The howl of the old Giacomo Leopardi
One more rejection and I will jump in the water.
One more rejection and I will never come back.
One more rejection and they will find pieces of my body
in every river from here to Genova.
Have you ever seen a man turned into cracked sea shells and broken china?
Have you ever in the disintegration of a body of illusions?
How a single shot of ammunition can help to bring a castle down.
And no internal valve will help. No tepid spring of past devotions.
No letter from the music of the spheres.
No. The flop is complete.
The total sum of your loss comes galloping down the mountain
like a titanic sledge of panic stricken owls and livid greyhounds.
You are left naked in the presence of regret
as the whole of mount Vesuvius crashes straight into your face.
And the lights go out.
And even the young Virgil is shit scared.
Cos we are all slave ships in the ocean of solitude and acceptance.
Cos a mere grimace can push a man into his darkest screech.
Cos blood evaporates and the body shrivels like an empty shell
and all that is left is the crust and the remnants of a howl?
More like a shriek. A desiccated scream.
The tattered vest of an athletic shout.
Have you heard such a thing?
It can make your limbs ache.
Have you ever felt the absence of the wind
when the heart of the clouds stop beating?
You, with your Greek chest and your Roman poise,
You, blessed with the eye sockets of the Persian Gods.
You, vermillion sun, purple and red.
You, who parade your curves in manors of Posillipo.
You, who wait by the fireplace of your beauty
for some green souled John to incinerate his future
in the heat and in your flames.
You, who keep your eyes in your pockets
as we disintegrate in the hovels of your face.
One more rejection and I will grow seaweed to cover my mouth.
One more rejection, and may my voice be my witness,
I will dissolve my heart in the taverns of Naples.
One more rejection and I, Giacomo Leopardi, will abandon my name.
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