Saturday, February 3, 2007
Snowflakes Comments
Rating: ★0.0
Snowflakes like diamonds,
Brightly blink on his chain.
Snowflakes like lip-gloss,
Sweetly sparkle on her lips.
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3/4/2026 2:53:06 AM # 1.0.0
ok, here comes some constructive critisism. word choice...you need more of it. your poem lacks vocabulary. my personal tastes like words. im infatuated with words. if there are to many common words, i grow board...this didnt keep my attention. second...WAY to many similies...(direct comparisons) . you need more metaphor (indirect comparisons) . that will add more hidden depth to your poetry.