Stagnant Stalwart Poem by Kitty Marie Lucas

i bear the same curse of my forefathers,
so i must hold the flag of generations passed
but i am gifted, so i hold 'potential'
to bring perfection and honor-
things you never had.

so, too gentle to be bitter,
marching on, i try
being patient and saintly
(though it, by virtue, i deny) .

you’ve taught me to despise my thoughts
and all i've put you through;
made me wish away my hands and self
for every single thing i do.

holding inborn confusion,
how i hate this 'disease',
striking at the wrong flesh;
nothing seems to ever please.

'don't dare disappoint'
but
'you're always wrong'
somehow, i force myself to care,
so i can go on strong.

but it's always the same damned failures
and i don't know what you expect me to do.

as for passing on the torch to the next-
you can bury me with it;
i refuse.