'The New World' Poem by Tamisha Bellamy

Tall, brown-haired, bearded, kind, white man.
My love.
Fun, strong, hairy, American, white man.
My first love.
You have started on this journey with me.
I will count and follow your every step, and you will lead.
Please tell me what you're thinking.
What are your intentions towards me, love?

Mother, where do you live?
In the sky? The clouds? The sea?
Show me your face. Give me a sign.
We rise. We rise.
Afraid of myself.
A God he seems to me.
What else is life but being near you?
Do they suspect?
All to be given to you, you to me.
I wil be faithful to you. True.
Two no more. One. One.
I am. I am.
Lover, you let me love you.
You made me love you.
Wherever you go, I shall be near.
In the sky. The clouds. The sea.
We are secret lovers.

Winter hurts me so.
Your denying words pierces my heart.
'You don't know who I am.'
Who are you, whom I love?
Oh, why do you push me away?
Now, you shall miss me.
Think of me.
I shall come fine you, and we will be.
Again. Again.

Long days pass. Months. Years.
It seems our love will bring trouble.
I fear.
All that you've said, and the way I felt when I was with you,
I remember.

God, what is happening?
Why has he forgotten?
Why do they sin?
Now I know our secret is out.
Forgive me, father. Forgive me.

Without my other half, I have no life. No name. No purpose.
Who am I?

Husband, you come, then you leave.
I have high hopes, then I bleed.
Goodbye love. Goodbye father. Goodbye self.
Now time for a fresh start.
A new beginning.
A new world.
A new love.

Tall, brown-haired, bearded, even more kinder man.
He walks with me, though I am still dead inside.
Who am I?
I still do not know.
Here he is again. He sits beside me with no need for words.
I know how he feels about me.
But do I feel the same?
I am not sure if loving him will be right.
However, I did agree to be his wife.

Mother, why can't I not feel as I should? Must?
Once false, I shall not be again.
Take out the thorn.
He is like a tree. He shelters me. I lie in his shade.
Can I Ignore my heart?
What is from you and what is not?
Great Sun, I offer you thanks.
You give life to the trees and the hills...
to the streams of water...
to all.

Mother, your love is before my eyes.
Show me your way. Teach me your path. Give me a humble heart.

What is it I hear?
'Captain Smith is alive'.
The words shoot through my ears like bullets.
My first love has come back to me.
But what am I to do?
Now, I have two husbands.

A new home now...
England.
Homage sweetly pay,
whilst towering in the azure sky,
they celebrate this happy day.
Let rolling streams their gladness show,
with gentle murmurs whilst they play,
and in their wild meandors flow,
rejoicing in this blessed day.
Kind health descends on downy wings,
angels conduct her on the way.
The New World's princess's new life brings,
and swells our joys upon this day.

I have experienced love and heartbreak,
witnessed sorrow and death.
But I have felt love and happiness again.
Married to a wonderful man, and have a beautiful son.

Now, my first love, you stand before me, always with words.
What do you want?
Why are you here?
You left me.
You lied to me.
You thought our moment in the forest was just a dream.
Then if you say it was, then it was.

Mother, now I know where you live.
You live through Thomas, my dear son.
In him, your love, strength, and energy remains to be strong.
And while I am lying sick losing my strength,
I start to think.

Everything that has happened between meeting John Smith and
marrying John Rolfe, I simply won't forget, nor will I regret.
Never.
Here at the end of my life, I now know who I am.
Matoaka no longer lives, she slowly disappeared just as her life
was being transformed.
I am no longer the beautiful Algonquian princess who loved playing
in the grass.
And although I do have many names, I treasure only one.
Rebekka Rolfe.