The Past Pain Poem by Cyclopseven R

As a boy my pain was an obstacle for freedom
that prevent me from being part and parcel
of casual play of younger minds
of my generations.
i wandered aimlessly in play
through the jungles and bushes
with marks of thorns all over my body
in play i was ever, despite the physical pain.
a child’s mind a virgin meadow
sow what you like, thus it grows
mild or wild.

as teenager my pain became insane
random pricking and pulsating agony
i lived with, almost daily.
my peers ran across the wilderness
i tried too but only with mild steps i could move
for endurance couldn’t hold the pain
fear followed instead of shadow
and tears i shed, in river it flowed.
teenage mind a toiled soil
easily grows any weeds out of many seeds,
in torture i was a lost teenage
restricted and bonded
by my own mind, the product of chained suffering.
karma, i was told by many
is the cause of this agony
but, who cared about me, the soul
in words they poured their sympathy without a pause,
can mere explanation, become medicinal soothe?

as a youth i was a tied stallion
who struggled to escape the energy
strong as it was, the energy was deadly enough
to handle wild - my thoughts in restless dance.
i couldn’t and i surrendered all of sudden
as the battle almost reach the destination,
when about to culminate in vain escape
my father in heaven pierced the cloud
and handed his helping hands
for me to hold.

i sobbed in relief
from an atheist, a theist i became
views changed,
the lights in golden hues
gave my life the right clue
without delay i marched
with many repeated stumbles
i grasped my soul again
to see my face mirrored therein
aha…this is my creator
i sighed in great relief.
finally, life’s breath took me here
to say life is great without pain and fear! !