Treading An Ocean For Miles Poem by Andrus Cassian

Can I tread an ocean for miles
eyes closed, in a paralyzed state
face up, not thinking
just whispering forgotten wishes
It's raining
can I just float away
on a nearby wave
silent, un-moving; don't have the strength to flinch
this gripping pain only as far as the clouds pace
but the fear of sinking is not reconciled thought
just the breathing un-parallel
Do I have to float or
sink
sink with
sink with the
sink with the anchor
sink with the anchor attached to my feet
No, just let me float
on this endless sea
No danger, the water calm
eyes closed, paralyzed
face up, not thinking
It's raining
silent, un-moving; gripping pain, un-parallel breathing
no echos, no remembering regrets
I don't need to remember to know
I can never forget
I can just feel it in the tumor
its going to kill me for the rest of my life