Walls Of Stone Poem by John Firhill

As a king in a castle dwelling
Who's got hardly any fear at all
From all enemies protected
Completely safe, I lived secure

Walls of stone my heart surrounded
A deep, wide moat uncrossable
Out of fear I hid my spirit
Making sure my grounds I held

Once I roamed about so freely
Fearing nothing, trusting all
Mingling openly, unsuspecting
Heart as soft as a cotton ball

Found a soul to trust completely
and was trusted in return
Nothing hiding, all confiding
My mind was void of all concern

Came the day of discontentment
It did not stand the test of time
Deprived of trust, echoed the sentence
Being lonely was my crime

Like dying flames turns into embers
I felt the heat subside within
Raw emotions, rubbed and shredded
Was told to take it on the chin

Now the hurting brought back memories
from a child deprived of love
Never hugged nor with cheers encouraged
more often felt a slap or shove

The teenage lad, lost and disoriented
ever hungering for approving words
not knowing where to find compassion
No one to show the attained awards

A shell of hardened steel encases
the heart that once held a tender spot
Now bulletproof, impenetrable
The childlike joy long gone, forgot

The years went by, I did not notice
what I was missing, what passed me by
I took the road more often traveled
Not stopping to see what was awry

The bitterness of discontentment
held me captive in my cell
I didn't know it, was just indifferent
Thought I was safe inside my shell

Although the knowledge of isolation
was evident, I still perceived;
to reach out and risk rejection
Wasn't worth the price of being deceived

Then came the day of trepidation
when someone cunningly, unseen
during the darkest of my hours
scaled the walls and entered in

Who's this foe of mine in darkness?
I asked myself and took to fight
With the sword and shield of anger
I stood up tall, fought like a knight

But the foe proved to be an angel
Disarmed me of my mighty arms
Loving eyes and words so sweet
Removed the fear, turned off the alarms

With words so wise she made me notice
To what the sum of life amounts;
It's not the years that you are alive,
but the years you Truly Live, that counts

So today I start preparing
a task enormous and grueling
Tearing the walls down into rubble
To let the Love of life come in

It won't get done today, I know
And not tomorrow, or this week
It may be years before they're gone
But to get it done is all I seek

You see, these walls were built to last
With skill and craftiness by me
To tear them down leaves me exposed
For all to see my insecurity

My heart's been cold as stone, and hard
Compassion wanting, deprived of love
Since childhood wounded, troubled, scarred
But today I'll have no more thereof

These words may not make sense to you
Perhaps you think I am a pretender
If you're befuddled with what I mumble
Go to Webster's, look up; Surrender!