When I Go Silent Poem by Mystic Qalandar

When I go silent,
I am identifying with my authentic self.
I am fighting through the demons of my past;
my true self is asserting its ground.

When I go silent,
I am usually resisting an urge.
Of what? I do not know.
Yet I know this: my true self stands firm
while the false self hovers on the verge
of collapse.
This is a breakthrough—
a rising from the dead.

When I go silent,
all I know is this:
a bright light waits
at the end of a long tunnel.
Will I continue toward that light
and overcome the shadows in my path?
I will be drawn—
toward my true self.

When I go silent,
the true self tries to take hold
of my soul, my life, my mind, my heart.
It burns within me.
The ancient echo of Alast
resounds through the halls of my being:
Am I not your Lord?

When I go silent,
the true self brings to light the mystery
between questioner and responder,
master and servant:
the hidden secret of the One as two,
revealing its love and its strength—
which would otherwise remain
folded away, concealed, unseen.

My true self leads me
to the place where I belong,
gathers me into vast and gentle arms,
and sings to me
the holy song of transcendence.

When I go silent,
it is because my true self is silencing me.
Some imagine it is deliberate.
Others attribute it to shyness.
But I simply have nothing to contribute;
it is all the work of my true self.

When I go silent,
no words appear.
No thoughts emerge.
Transcendence draws near.

When I go silent,
I am beyond inside and outside.
I am beyond first and last.
And in that silence,
I return to what I have always been:
a witness to the Light,
a servant of the Light
that has never ceased to be
both transcendent and immanent.

—MyKoul