When I’m Old Poem by Michael Moorcroft

When I’m old I refuse to wear those beige pants,
Instead I’ll wear Calvin Klein low boot cut jeans,
When I’m old I refuse to have grey hair,
Instead I’ll get it professionally dyed and cut to the latest style.

When I’m old I refuse to drive those mobility scooters,
Instead I’ll travel in a stretch limousine,
When I’m old I refuse to have a walking stick,
Instead I’ll have a state of the art cane.

When I’m old I refuse to have wrinkles,
Instead I’ll have plastic surgery and botox,
When I’m old I refuse to fall asleep by the fire,
Instead I’ll fall asleep on someone’s floor after a 24 hour party.

When I’m old I’ll set a new example,
For the next batch of old people to follow.

© Michael Moorcroft August 26th 2009