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Tiffany Rose Moczydlowski (November 28,1996 / Springfield, MA)
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Tape And Glue
''My heart is very fragile, held together
By a bit of tape and glue.
It can't handle being shattered again;
Keep it safe and hold it close,
So that it might heal.''
Unable to deal with another blow,
I gave you the opportunity to
Revive or repress my happiness.
Would you dropp my weakened heart
All in due time?
I couldn't predict the outcome.
You worked your way into it.
The tape and glue fell away
As you took their place in
Piecing it together and repairing my wounds
With your tender love that fills
The once gaping, hollow spaces where
Missing components were never regained
And the cracks that were forged
Through the most powerful of pressures.
The last remedy that has a possibility
Of succeeding is your time, your love,
And your life.
For now my heart is strong,
With your essence infused within it,
But if you were to attempt to
Abandon it, when you provide its
Only structure, the slivers that remain
Would hardly be salvageable
And forced to be scrapped.
You've made a permanent mark
On this once battered, worn,
Torn and tattered heart, and
It can no longer survive without you.
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very fine, very fine, thanks.
''My heart is very fragile, held together
By a bit of tape and glue. Love your title and wordings. Very well composed.
Now this one had a emo-love genre/theme that makes sense. keep it up with other genre/theme's such as horror or comedy or any of them :)
I read this after reading Wind and the Winds and I think this is a thousand times better; you threw away the baggage of trying to sound like somebody else, and seem to have a voice that is more acclimated to yourself and makes you unique.
The tape and glue fell away
As you took their place in
Piecing it together and repairing my wounds
With your tender love that fills
The once gaping, hollow spaces where
Missing components were never regained
And the cracks that were forged
See this is what’s great, fantastic use of similes and alliterations which don’t sound hackneyed from other works, this is all you and that is why I think it is really great.
I like the way you use free rhyme to tell a story to the reader. Interesting piece
Regards,
~Besa
Im not sure what to think, I had to read it a few times to understand, normally when I do read it just jumps at me, how people write I mean, this is good, it expresses how you feel with every line, just needs to flow together, but I still think you are a brillant poet for one so young I mean the first one I read just blew me away. Actually made my mouth dropp with a gaping look of wonder...smiles...anyway keep up the writes my friend...hope we are if you want you can leave comments on mine as well would love to see what you think.
I admire ur tact and craft.this only simply conveys a strong emotion of love and not to impress. Though not ur best poem, bt it conveys d emotion well enough. I'd like u 2 rd some of mine too.
:) This is a very well thought out piece of work. I enjoyed reading it and I hope that you continue to write for your whole life because you have a true talent here and no matter what anybody says, it is good. I'm sure you make God smile. The emotions in this piece are clear, which is a wonderful thing. It is very nice.
I really enjoyed it because I really like love poems, and it feels good to read feelings I can remember having for someone, though a long time ago.
i think this is geart and you should keep it up, it s a beautiful poem. x tamara