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Noreen Carden

Freshman - 1,032 Points (16/12/50 / Mayo)

Two Souls On The Shore


Reach out your hand to me my love
and bid me walk with you awhile
Along this sandy moonlit shore.
Where i walked once a child

A woman now i search your eyes
Our hearts stand face to face
and cannot lie
Knowing if we part and meet no more
Our souls will kiss forever on this shore

Submitted: Tuesday, September 03, 2013
Edited: Monday, January 20, 2014

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

This is a memory from long ago of first love

Comments about this poem (Two Souls On The Shore by Noreen Carden )

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  • Bronze Star - 5,211 Points Daniel Brick (4/6/2014 9:02:00 PM)

    This is such a lovely and tender poem I almost feel like my clumsy words will spoil the spell it casts. And that is the best word for the effect - a spell, which temporarily lifts a veil from our eyes and instead of seeing the world as it is we can see the world as it should be, or should have been. A first love, yes, it both hurts and heals to think back on those events. But our hearts will be broken by life, at least these memories fill the heart with a happiness just out of reach but still very real. I'm saving this poem too. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Dr.tony Brahmin (2/12/2014 11:04:00 AM)

    Knowing if we part and meet no more
    Our souls will kiss forever on this shore soooooooooo beautiful. you are very imaginative.... souls kissing on the shore.............. forever......... truly poetic Noreen thank you (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 3,842 Points Bri Edwards (1/19/2014 8:09:00 PM)

    Noreen, although i don't care much for love poems, as you may read in my poem:

    [[ I Don't Care Much For Love Poems...[Love; Marriage; Personal; Romance] ]]

    i have decided to give this one a whirl.
    AND because i like to be helpful to other poets [some might say i'm a pain in the arse], i have taken the liberty to put some comments, in brackets, in between the lines of your poem, as follows:


    Reach out your hand to me my love
    and bid me walk with you awhile
    Along this sandy moonlit shore.
    Where i walked once a child

    [i like the first stanza, BUT I THINK YOU 'WANT' as between once and a. otherwise a reader may think you once walked a child, kind of like walking a dog, along the beach, whereas i believe you mean that you walked there when YOU were a child. hmmm? ]

    A woman now i search your eyes
    Our hearts stand face to face
    and cannot lie
    Knowing if we part and meet no more
    Our soul s will kiss forever on this shore

    [did you mean the 2nd and 3rd lines to be separate lines or did you or poemhunter make them separate when you meant them to be ONE? ? i'll go either way, but i prefer combining them; it makes the rhyming smoother for one thing. yeah, thanks for the rhymes. :)
    AND i think you want souls, not soul s. yes? , my friend.

    like i said, i don't like love poems [maybe that's why i've been divorced three times? ? (ha ha) ] but this one is okay. thanks for sharing. bri :) (Report) Reply

  • Bronze Star - 5,557 Points Amitava Sur (1/3/2014 9:22:00 PM)

    A lovely romantic expression making a statement - Love lasts for ever.... in the concluding lines
    'Knowing if we part and meet no more
    Our soul s will kiss forever on this shore'......... very nice (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 3,909 Points Khairul Ahsan (12/14/2013 10:33:00 AM)

    This is an absolute beauty! The note is as sweet and innocent as the memory of the first love. This reminds me of mine.
    'Knowing if we part and meet no more
    Our soul s will kiss forever on this shore'
    Touchy! Cathartic! 10/10.
    I have liked almost all of the comments put here. (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 2,750 Points Hazel Durham (12/9/2013 10:23:00 AM)

    So romantic with deep desires connecting along the sea shore, with their love forever locked within their souls.
    Beautiful write! (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 12,028 Points Valsa George (12/2/2013 7:03:00 AM)

    A romantic setting for the lovers to meet! Like the sea, their hearts are also turbulent with emotions! Though they are not sure if they would meet again, they are sure about onething that the sea will remain a mute witness to their love! Beautiful! ! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 873 Points Smoky Hoss (10/28/2013 4:52:00 PM)

    A moment caught in eternity, and perfectly caught in these wonderful words. (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 2,239 Points Patricia Grantham (9/14/2013 8:54:00 AM)

    This is so charming and delightful. The seashore has a very
    soothing effect. The calm lapping of the waves against the
    reefs provides a beautiful setting. Especially for love and
    and romance. (Report) Reply

Read all 17 comments »

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