Andrea Collier

Andrea Collier Poems

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Motivation Not To Be The Old Me

There's knowledge and there's wisdom,
There's logic and there's vision,
Do you hear me? Or will you listen?
Nobody grows up to be a junkie, a druggie, somebody frowned on by a society
that grew up just like me, and grew down hypocritically, frowned upon brown nosed and rebelled,
Excelled or failed,
Both propelled by figuring out everything your around.
I didn't get here compelled to take leaps and bounds into places I was never curious about.
And all the things your furious about, aren't things i found,
They're just things I found out
Gently bending the minds of the malleable,
Persuasion is powerful, when you back your words with a good enough reason
To be.
Or not to be.
Either way it must've piqued my curiosity.
Don't feel like a failure for you or for me.
Its unfulfilling to feel that much sympathy, when no ones at fault for the capacity a brain has for learning.
when a mind can process ten things from the eye, but only identify three knowingly.
Amazing the way your mind stays at work subconsciously
Don't get me wrong,
The path I'm on is my fault.
Just try to understand, that if you've ever worried that I would be just like you, then I was around a reason that triggered those worries that one day fell into my hands.
And I shouldn't have said yes,
But I did so willingly.
And honestly,
I wouldn't be me without getting where I've gotten me.
But I will learn from my mistakes,
No mistake, despite what I used to say.
I'm saying now I'm sorry lets move on into this brand new mindset
I don't expect you to believe me, just reread these words one day and know I must've meant that.
Time to stop saying I'll fix that and start fixing,
Start paying attention to the way I'm living.
I'm fixated on what's next, and my fixation on it makes me miss the old me
And everyone that knows me knows its so me to make my mind up like this,
So I'm folding it up and taking it with me.
I'll relive it,
But just as memories to remind myself that I finally did it.
I'll be proud of the way I'm living
and where I'm going,
Because thank God for showing me I'd never find the missing piece of a puzzle that would never bring me peace.
Thank God I didn't miss the point of the journey
The day I decided not to be the old me.

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