I don't know why I'm slandered so,
If I go high,--if I go low,--
There's always some one who will say,
'Just see that mercury to-day!'
...
Prince Curlilocks remarked one day
To Princess Dimplecheek,
'I haven't had a real good play
For more than 'most a week.'
...
Once there was a Pirate Poodle,
And he sailed the briny seas
From the land of Yankee Doodle
Southward to the Caribbees.
...
This is the Queen of Nonsense Land,
She wears her bonnet on her hand;
She carpets her ceilings and frescos her floors,
...
A was an apt Alligator,
Who wanted to be a head-waiter;
He said, 'I opine
In that field I could shine,
...
Betty Botta bought some butter;
'But,' said she, 'this butter's bitter!
If I put it in my batter
It will make my batter bitter.
...
'Twas the night before the Fourth of July, the people slept serene;
The fireworks were stored in the old town hall that stood
...
This figure here before you is a Macaroni Man,
Who is built, as you may notice, on a most ingenious plan.
...
Triangular Tommy, one morning in May,
Went out for a walk on the public highway.
Just here I will say,
'Twas a bright sunny day,
...
Our Bobby is a little boy, of six years old, or so;
And every kind of rubbish in his pocket he will stow.
...