I was born in Milwaukee. Later, I moved with family to Glencoe, Illinois: a suburb of Chicago. Later, they moved to Stockton, Illinois; midway between Rockford, Illinois and Dubuque, Iowa; to edit a newspaper. They later moved to Evansville, Wisconsin, midway between Madison and Janesville. They edited a newspaper there too. After graduating high school, I attended junior college at Richland Center, and college at UW-Whitewater. I majored in journalism. I never graduated. After my mother died, I moved in with my father, who relocated to his boyhood home of Stoughton,16 miles southeast of Madison. I worked as a security guard. My father died after I relocated to Madison. I worked as a page in the Wisconsin state assembly. I worked in the dishroom of a restaurant, Ovens of Brittany. I worked as a courier at the University of Wisconsin. I quit to devote full time to my writing.
I was a poor student and a poor athlete in school. I never had a girlfriend until recently. When I was a teenager I used to hate myself. Later I decided the only reason I had for hating myself was the mere fact that I did.
I would pay much more than I can ever afford
To undue the harm I have done.
Maybe God makes us bad at first
So we'll be better in the long run.
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My rich uncle loved me so much, he wouldn't include me in his will.
Because he didn't want me as a suspect in case he was murdered.
Nowhere is a compliment met with less gratitude than at a funeral.
Anyone who tells you he is afraid of death, can't be speaking from experience.
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I'm an pessimist.
I heard it will snow.
I'm an optimist.
I heard it will be ideal for skiing, snowing, and building snowmen.
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The crack and shine of opening a new textbook.
The feeling of too warm to wear a t-shirt under my shirt in the afternoon and too cold in the morning not to wear one.
The sparkling new desk on the first day of class.
Standing single-file in a crowded line carrying a tray in the cafeteria.
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Alligators have long jaws.
Lions have sharps claws.
A giraffe has a neck that reaches and reaches.
Fish go to school, but nobody teaches.
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