Kazayan Raawban

Kazayan Raawban Poems

The Best Poem Of Kazayan Raawban

When I'M Afraid

I am afraid
i am afraid
to be awake
in my bed
the morning after
the news,
dread
creeping over me
in goose-flesh...
a slimy,
filmy
net of sweat...
wondering what will be
next,
or left...
i wonder if it hurts,
how long can i work
before it creeps
through me
like a sick worm
through dirt?
i wonder
if the witch doctor
will appear first,
with a miracle cure...
radiate me
with his sun stick
and kill the worm
for sure....
or perhaps
i'll just refuse
to accept
by sheer force
of will,
drive out the worm
and all his ills....
i am afraid
to think
i'll never laugh again,
or never as hard
as i did
as a kid....
maybe my friends
won't remember
the crazy things
we did...
if i'm gone
will the world
still spin?
will people
sing my favorite songs?
drink my favorite gin?
who will marry
my rib...?
throwing a coat
on my door post...
calling it his....
a new father
for my children,
i want to feel sorry
for myself,
to cry,
to vent this rage,
but the well
is dry....
i can only wait
with a good feeling...
a healing....
everything ok...
even a terrible fate
cannot steal
my joy away,
my zeal to be
myself,
bold,
even in my faults
at all cost....
so maybe
this is
the strength
that i'll draw on
in darker days....
when i am afriad
when i am afraid
when i am afraid
when i am afraid
i will remember
who i am
and what makes me,
not defined
by what the worm
would be...
i am holy
and unique,
a star blinking
eternally...
i don't know
what this journey
will hold,
how bitter cold
the winds blow...
wrapping these truths
around my soul
like a warm coat...
i'll do my best
to not think
of future days
but just enjoy
this one....
when i am afaid
when i am afraid
when i am afraid

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