Laura Clayton Poems

I wish I could peel off my scars and seal them in a manila envelope
Then hide it in the back of my wardrobe, along with all the sleeveless t-shirts that still have their price tags on
Just so I didn’t have to be reminded of my mistakes every time I look at my arms
Do you see me holding up a poster with “I SELF HARM” written on it?
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If you could have a second chance at life
Would you finally get things right?
Would you do all that it takes
To undo all of your past mistakes?
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If I counted how many times you told me you wanted to kill yourself, I would run out of fingers and toes. Let me tell you something, dear; life is not like the video games that you love to play so much. There is no ‘try again’ button.
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There are 124 notches in my bedpost, one for each man that I have slept with;
And if you looked closely, you would see your name next to the very first one.

It is proven that sex gives you a feeling of euphoria and releases endorphins;
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You will probably think that these words are going to be poisonous and filled with phrases such as
“You deserve each other” and “I hope he cheats on you too.”
I admit, I did consider penning a hateful letter;
I could have posted it through your letter box among with a pack of maggots, if I wanted to.
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When we were little kids, our hardest decision was choosing which colour crayon to use
Or which toy to play with at break-time
We didn’t care if our hair was out of place because we were having too much fun rolling down a hill in the summer time
And we never worried that the cheeseburger and chips we just ate would make us gain weight.
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So you’ve been stuck in hell for quite a while
And you can’t even summon the strength to smile
Every day you feel so low
When will you escape your woe?
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This time last year, you were all that I had
You knew how to make me happy when I was sad
My worries I shared, my secrets I told to you
You were my sister, and you were all that I knew
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I couldn’t survive if we ever did part
But a small part of me wants to break your heart
The only love I’ve ever known is the kind that falls through
I guess I just want to end things before you do
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So you got knocked down yet again
But you don’t have to endure this pain
Get up from the ground and stand up tall
Don’t let people make you feel small
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