If I Were
If I were the boyfriend of Krysten,
What purpose would I have?
What butterfly would please me,
When her lips are so fat?
I wish her hair were autumn red,
And her skin were not so white,
Her hair is brunette instead,
i wish her teeth weren't as tight!
Her neck is one that every man would kiss,
Her shoulders just as graceful,
I wish she hadn't been with so many,
Perhaps then I would be more thankful.