15th Of March 2014 Comments

This isnt really a peom..

Last week my councillor diagnosed me with depression and anxiety and since the start of the year i have been feeling empty, just imagine watching yourself drown, suffocating, while everyone around you was breathing, they see you but carry on with what they're doing even though you're an arm length away, and they could save you by just taking one step closer, thats what depression feels like, its like a black hole and you can feel yourself slipping away slowly even more everyday, every little piece of your personality starts going, those little traits that everyone recognised you by, they disappear, one at a time, and the next thing you know you're nothing, just a mind and a body and all they're telling you is to die, or in my case cut and die, these thoughts just fill your head and you can't get rid of them no matter what you try and do, or say, if you are listening to music you will point all the bad bits out, or end up searching for ‘original depression songs' on youtube because people explain exactly how you feel, within two and a half minutes, everything you've wanted to say, gets said, you crave to tell your mum how you are feeling, how you want to die, show her the cuts on your body, and let her hug you while you cry your heart out because you've been keeping this all together for so long.
This is how i've felt for the last 11 months, the date is 6th of September 2014, in 9 days it would have been 7 months since i tried to kill myself from depression on the 15th of March 2014.
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