Amissis Te Poem by Oreoluwa Opeyemi

Sometimes I'm okay.
The smiles are easier to fake.
The laughter comes like second nature.
The blinds are open and the light filters in,
Too bright for my demons to come up to the surface and whisper in my ears.
Then all of a sudden!
It stops.
I'm sucked under,
I can't get air.
My chest hurts; heart beating loudly in my ears,
I lose myself.
I always seem to come back though,
For awhile until it happens again.
I find my way back.
Then it happens again,
I come back again.
Then it happens again.
And again. And again. And again.


It takes longer to come back now.
And when I do, a piece of me is gone.
My eyes cloudy with pain,
My back bent from the weight of the extra baggage; a souvenir of some sorts.
My blade stained with the reddish-brown taint of dried blood, mostly mine.
Fresh wounds, new scars.
I never know when I'd go away, or how long till I come back.
But I know one thing;
One day I'd go, and I won't come back.