Bad Poetry #1 Poem by Patti Masterman

I lurve you like old guys like Depends
I lurve you like teams that never win
I lurve you like dysentery loves toilets
I lurve you like chocolate cake likes doilies.

I lurve you just like the Twelfth of Never
I lurve you like politicians think they're clever
I lurve you like lawyers love divorce
I lurve you like germs that make me hoarse.

I lurve you like TB in a tenement
I lurve you like hemorrhoids love liniment
I lurve you so I wrote this poem to tell you
I've taken space on Ebay, just to sell you.