Bank Robbing To Pay Off The Bank (A Riff) - Poem by David McLansky
The day he robbed our local bank
I was feeling in fine mettle;
'Don't push that hidden button, Frank,
Don't step on that foot pedal.'
'All I want is money, '
He said brandishing his gun,
I behind my huge oak desk,
I did not duck or run.
'Would you like to take out a loan,
Mortgage rates are low, '
A teller was heard to faint and groan,
He waved his shot gun slow.
‘Perhaps you need a new car loan,
A hybrid's good on gas,
A Chevy Volt, its dash two tone;
Sit down, let's do the math.'
He laid the shot gun gently down
Upon my cluttered desk,
He had a band of shot gun shells
Criss-crossed across his chest.
'Or do you want to go to Vegas
And blow off some pent up steam;
Or to take the kids to Disney World,
Every family's dream? '
'The truth is I'm behind on bills
I have huge consumer debt,
I don't know how to pay it off, '
And here the gunman wept;
'And the interests rates are killing me,
It's twenty-five percent;
Our home is in foreclosure
And we pay the bank npw rent.
Do you know how much I owe? '
He said with some concern,
'My 3 kids have college loans,
They can't finish out the term.'
I got Sue Orman on the phone
And explained his situation,
'I'm working 3 at Burger King, '
He cried in desperation.
Susie asked to talk to him,
'This is really not your fault;
Pick up your gun, put on your mask,
How much is in the vault? '
And so the debtor robbed the bank,
He broke the institution,
'But not to worry, ' said V.P. Frank
'He made full restitution.'
Comments about Bank Robbing To Pay Off The Bank (A Riff) by David McLansky
Read this poem in other languages
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
Still I Rise
The Road Not Taken
If You Forget Me
Edgar Allan Poe
Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening
Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep
Mary Elizabeth Frye