Amanda R. McKinnon

Broken - Poem by Amanda R. McKinnon

I thought I could let you go when you didn't change. I thought I would be okay and that I'd survive the pain.

I thought that I would heal and that I could move on. I thought that I could cope with you being gone.

I thought life would get better without you here. No more crying in the night or living my life in fear.

Even though I'm living my life and making it day by day. I can't help but think 'Maybe there was another way.'

I lay in bed at night and cry myself to sleep. And all I can think of is this cut that seems so deep.

We both made our mistakes and now we both pay the price. A good love has gone so bad. Was it worth the sacrifice?

At night I dream of the way things use to be. And I can't help but wonder 'Do you ever think of me? '

I know we'll never be again and I have to say goodbye. But it's so hard moving on when it all feels like a lie.

You stole my heart so long ago and I never got it back. Too hurt to let anyone in, my life is just an act.

I pretend that I'm okay, and smile when I'm on stage. But the truth is that deep inside I'm just a bird that's caged.

A nagging ache deep within stays with me constantly. And all I want in life is to have you back with me.

But I'll go on pretending, reality hurts too much. And I'll hold on to the memories of your warm and tender touch.

Those are the treasures which I cling to everyday, And given the chance again I'd take this pain away.

I'd sit down and listen, I'd give you another chance. One more time to hold my hand, one more time to dance.

To see your smile upon your face and the laughter in your voice. I wish I had just one more chance to make another choice.

But the dance is over and now I'll forever sit in pain. If what they say is true I'll learn to dance in the rain.

So teach me how to breathe again and how to hold my head high. Teach me how to hold it down when I always want to cry.

Teach me how to numb the pain when it over takes my soul. And teach me how to make myself once again feel whole.

Maybe one day I can move on and the smile will somehow be true. Maybe one day I'll forget that I'm still in love with you.

Poet's Notes about The Poem

This was written when my husband and I were at a very dark time in our relationship. Luckily prayers do get answered and we found our way back to each other.

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Maya Angelou

Caged Bird

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Poem Submitted: Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Poem Edited: Saturday, July 28, 2012

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