Chosen As Mine - Poem by Anitah Muwanguzi
It rips, and it bleeds
my mind is turned inside out,
the blood dripping in my outstretched palm
eyes, they see nothing
I stare blindly
in my head, the song goes on, ‘I love you oh yes I do’
‘You were on my mind as I died, you’re chosen as mine’
my mind's eye sees his face as he says those words to me
‘Know my voice, I will never leave you, I have loved you since
before the sands of time were made
I love you still’
My heart will not listen, it will not see,
the pain all consuming,
the tears meld with the blood oozing from my chest
I fall down on my knees, and stare at the empty sky
The song in my heart goes on
‘Cries in the desert my child I hear them’
I scream loud as I can, try to exorcise the pain
it remains, and the bleeding goes on
I stare at my empty hands dripping with my own blood
the dagger in my right hand
I want to believe.
I want to be faith itself right now,
the one place where hope grows but everywhere hurts too much.
My world is falling, crumbling all around me on every side.
The falling debris means nothing
fate mocks me, courage eludes me,
the sun hurts my eyes, but it won’t stop
the warmth envelopes me, and life goes on around me
inside everything is driving to a halt
My head is spinning,
I see the shadows that terrify me,
and I don’t care anymore
'Let them get me this time, perhaps it is time.'
But He won’t let me go.
And this time when he whispers` I love you still, always will,
you’re chosen as mine’
I open my eyes and stare deep into the brilliance of his light, and
give Him everything
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