Conciousness Comments

I'm in one of those moods, where the only thing i want is complete silence. If noise is around me, i can block it out, stop it from entering my ears. And just listen to the sound of nothing.
I can step out of myself, and see things in retrospect. I could never really put my finger on what triggers this sort of..bliss. But it comes and goes whenever it pleases. And i know that, i am much more calm collected and quite when it does.. and whever i speak, it seems to be the 'right' thing to say. As if i suddenly became wise. Or... maybe it just feels that way.
So i write now as if the words i type sustain the bloodflow of my body. The more sentences you read, the more my heart beats. As if without this sort of activity, there is only a hollow self absorbed existance.
The more time i spend as a pariah, the more i feel mentally connected with myself, and others. When you have nothing to do, like no job to go to in the morning, no homework due, nothing. Just the next day to live through, it's sort of like a freedom for your psyche. It can be both good and bad i suppose, not many people really like the idea of a person living inside their own personal haven for extended amounts of time. But.. i do get out a few times a week. Though i won't shy from the fact that i enjoy myself, in my room. I think what get's me here in this mood is something like an epiphany, or something like 'the end'. When something was doing, is now over.
...
Read full text