Rookie (11/03/1994 / Kolkata)

Confessions Of A Drug Addict - Poem by SUVANKAR SEN

I was a boy,
Just like others,
A normal, simple boy.
I went to school,
Played with friends, enjoyed,
& came back home.
I grew up,
As is the law of nature.
I had to go outside,
As ordered by my father.
So, I went out,
To study further,
My father chilled,
He now had no bother.
I went to some engg. college,
So as they say,
I wanted to do something,
But was thrown off the bay.
o.k., still no problem,
I silently suffered,
The Brilliants enjoyed,
While my brain puckered.
I was distraught,
My life was a hell,
I was sad, so I cried,
My little eyes did swell.
But then someone,
Came to me,
To offer me his hospitality.
Foolish, & sad, then I was,
I accepted his invitation,
I stepped into darkness,
It was my only consolation.
In the college,
I made them my first friends,
They had the same pain, as mine,
& were knowing the latest trends.
Trends, what do u mean?
I asked them, honestly,
They said, " it‟s cool, dude",
I believed them foolishly.
They gave me the poison,
Which u will say with loath, „DRUGS‟.
I say now, it‟s not poison,
I accepted it with tight hugs,
But it was to become my life‟s,
„Destruction Bugs‟.
How I took it first,
I really don‟t remember,
May through a little cigarette,
When I smoked sometimes for pleasure.
To my wonder, I found,
It wasn‟t venom,
But elixir abound,
When it went passed through my anatomy,
I saw the world spinning around.
I wanted that elixir every day,
I just couldn‟t live without it.
My health went from bad to worse,
But I just couldn‟t leave it.
The dosage grew,
The things became new,
Although we were few,
We lived our lives anew.
They, I mean, my friends,
Said it was fun,
When u took it,
All the things were became one.
No fears, no tension, no threats,
No pressure, no sadness, no regrets,
Just pure ecstasy,
That seemed like a fairy tale fantasy.
They were too true,
My lust for the drugs grew.
My results started dropping,
But my drugs kept on coming.
Just a little money,
& a lot of drugs,
That was even better than honey,
We were now loathsome thugs.
One day, my friend said,
When he came here first,
He too was afraid.
He was forced to become an engineer,
But, alas, his mental engine broke down.
Then, came, to his rescue,
„That‟ thing, that made everything new.
But the tale &s not here,
He had nothing to fear,
He just existed for his happiness now.
Same was with me,
I said to him,
I wanted to become a doctor,
But I myself was a patient now.
One day, Prof. Treacherous,
nicknamed as such,
cornered me, & asked a question,
as usual, I failed again,
he started cursing me, such & such.
It was like this, with weaklings like us,
No one realize our pains.
Like, we‟re thrown away,
On shining silver plates.
The „Brilliants‟ mocked us, especially me,
They said, "u, jerk, just try to be,
like us,
else never will u catch, ur life‟s bus."
They weren‟t wrong, that I say,
But whenever I tried to be close to them,
The pushed me away.
That was, until my „FRIENDS‟ came,
& myself, got a new name.
„Drug Addicts‟, we are now called,
We are very bad, people are told.
Maybe good, maybe bad,
But it‟s true, that,
We‟re not mad, but terribly sad.
People say,
We‟re good for nothings,
But a blot on the society,
We‟re the cursed beings,
Who don‟t beg for mercy.
One day, we decided,
To run away,
From this cage,
which they call,
„The Temple Of Knowledge‟,
To hell with this temple,
To us, it was like a bondage.
One dark night,
When all were asleep,
We began our journey,
To make all things right.
We were free birds now,
Like skylarks flying over the bay,
We had complete freedom now,
We thus went our way.
But we needed capital,
Not for food, nor water,
What‟re they to us?
What we wanted,
Was nothing more than „DRUGS‟.
When the drug courses through ur body,
U become one with ur soul,
No emotions, feelings, nothing,
U just want to howl.
It‟s a pleasure inexplicable,
With us, it‟s just compatible,
Wonderfully, it‟s portable,
We take it, when we are able,
It‟s flow is like fire,
Through the body‟s cable,
It never makes u tire,
It only makes u more stable.
Thus days passed, we were now,
Stealing, ha! Was a pastime now,
We‟d broken all bonds.
Our parents came to know of these,
They came to search for us,
As much as I heard,
In the college, there was a lot of ruckus.
But, we‟re nowhere to be found,
Not in that area, nor anywhere around.
We lived in a place,
That u would call a mess,
Though u may call it hell,
It was there that we lived well.
But happiness left us,
As soon it had come,
We felt sick now,
The countdown had already begun.
Our faces were jagged, ragged,
Like some thorny terrain,
Through our eyes, there was,
Constant pouring of rain.
Now we felt pain,
Our hands didn‟t move,
Slow became our brain,
Our legs didn‟t move.
The elixir of our life, the drugs,
Had become at last,
Our destructor bugs,
That was gonna kill us, the thugs.
At last, when we could take it no more,
We went out, to seek for,
help, in the form of more drugs.
We ate drugs, we drank drugs,
We talked drugs, we dreamt drugs.
It was the part & parcel of our life,
Just like a henpecked husband to his wife.
But, at last, we‟re found,
& our playtime was over.
They took pity on us,
The parents, I mean.
Sent us to hospitals,
So, that we couldn‟t be seen.
But, alas! it‟s too late,
Almighty has opened the gate,
To nowhere but hell,
Just like earlier, my eyes did again swell.
Then I realized,
What was the point in this,
If we had to perish like this?
Apple of the eyes once we‟re,
Sand in the eyes now we‟re.
We were rejected by the society,
It was a lesser pain then,
Thought we‟re shunned by the city,
Happy were we when.
My father, sitting beside me,
Does nothing, but weep,
He begs to God,
"Just allow me to keep,
enough have I seen,
i love my son for true,
please don‟t make me weep."
Now I realize, what an idiot I had been,
Never did I speak to my father,
Else never would have this day been.
I never said him what I wanted,
So, he gave me what he wanted,
I, too nervous to refuse,
Now, at last, was no more than a refuse.
Slowly, my body crumbles away,
I feel the searing pain,
The „POISON‟ that I consumed,
Has already damage my brain.
With whatever I have now,
I am telling u my sad story,
Never taste drugs,
It will rob u of ur life‟s glory.
This life is a wonderful gift,
But I have made a lot of rift,
Damaging this rare gift.
Alas! My body is passing out,
It has become totally decrepit,
Never take drugs, children of God!
These are nothing but poison,
May seem to u elixir,
But is like a prison,
That will trap ur soul &,
Turn u into a ghoul.
Trust the judgment of this dying decrepit,
These are „confessions of a drug addict‟……...

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, April 3, 2012

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