Depression Is Just Like That Poem by Anonymous Still

It's funny when your every emotion becomes a symptom
Like all the  tears and the fears and miseries and it's outcome
No wonder my love for you was always oxytocin
My lost ambition was the lost serotonin
How chemical was it the trust that I had on people
And the joy and the chills and the excitement lost no matter how much I dig deeper?
Was it chemical too? ?
Like the body which is only carbon
And how mechanical the brain is
But what about the satisfaction achieved when the work was done
Which chemical was it hun?
I get the chemical imbalance messing with the brain
And the body resisting my ownself and the energy being drained
I get the chemicals are required to achieve it
But  pain that I have felt and the tears i have cried
The loneliness i have delt and the saying those lies
To hide my insecurities and showing myself strong
And happy
And fine
Was that all about chemicals? ?
Does that mean nothing is or was ever wrong? ?
Or in the process i have lost my wit?
Enough of the embarrassment
Enough of feeling shame
Enough of playing this "being strong" game
I Was and am broken
And was never the most chilled out girl of the group
Was never the "cool" or brave one
I was never as courageous as y'all
But even amidst the storm i got my stuff done
And you know what
I fuckin' OWN IT..
I OWN being a cry baby or weak
No matter when the times were happy or bleak
I OWN being scared
When the life laughed at me with the challenges it dared
I OWN being shy
Nd to avoid your all the ifs how's and why's
And i this mess that have been temporarily made
I won't tell ya" look how strong i am"
Rather I own it being afraid....