Did You Know? Poem by Taylor Fong

Not a day goes by where I don't flash back to that night.
That night that puts so many thoughts in my head that scream at me.
That make me feel so low, I feel as if I'm below rock bottom.
And I wish I could just forget.
Erase you, erase everything you've ever put me through from my memory.
I just need to get out of this hell you've put me in.
I need to escape.

I need music.
I need to feel the beat of the bass pound harder than I felt my heart pound that night.
I need to hear his melodic voice louder than I hear yours in the back of my mind, the one that makes me cringe.
I need razors.
I need to feel he blade pressed against my skin harder than you held me down.
I need blood to flow out faster than I ran from your car.
I need mary jane.
I need to inhale the smoke deeper than the air I gasped for.
I need to smell weed more than I smelled your breath in my face that choked me.
I need booze.
I need my throat to burn hotter than my eyes did when I held back the tears.
I need to drink more alcohol than the tears I've cried.
I need to explode.
I need to scream louder than my mind was screaming for you to stop.
I need to pick up the pieces of my heart that you've broken and put them back together so the blood can flow normally again.

I just need to escape.
I need to erase you from my memory.

Written 7/11/09