Dilemma Poem by RAJ VIKRAM

What is love for you?
A passive exercise or a
quest for a temporary
trance from which you slyly
saunter away with a mischievous
parting smile time and again.
What do you derive by
craving my presence,
albeit temporarily and with
the kind of transience that is
as routine as the switching
of an electric bulb.
I burn to shine for you
and whittle myself down,
knowing clearly that the
exit door from this world is
getting closer to me
with every passing microsecond.
Know that my effulgence
drains me and it is not a
pleasant feeling to fall down
with a thud from the heights
that you take me to with your
transmuting dalliance.
I fall every time for you
inveigled by your behemoth
like significance.
From a bare metal of prohibitive
and brazen insignificance
I turn to gold or an even more
precious metal unaware to man.
Like an alchemist you alter me
into forms that I was never
aware that I was capable of.
You are a daunting proposition
everytime you withdraw from
me with an elan that's your
omniscient characteristic.
I inhabit the valleys occasionally
and the plains mostly
plagued by my pestilential
and contained existence.
The peak that you are,
is inaccessible until you
turn benevolent just when
prodded by your whims.
But then this waxing and
waning propels me
sustains me and I exult
rapturously and then pine
like a tormented soul
and alternate like a bipolar
being beyond the scales
of the norms of normalcy.
This dilemma makes me a
hotchpotch entity neither
here nor there but in a bargain
I would settle for this
confused state and will
stay put here till that
day you may become
perennial and permeant.