Don't Think About It Too Much... Poem by Paola Mateo

I met my soul mate, the love of my life, the other half of my heart, while I was in college studying abroad. From the moment our eyes met and we said hello, we never stopped talking. Fast forward 3 yrs 3 months and 19 days, after another dead end conversation about wedding dates, who would be moving where (he was in DR and I was in NY) , he decided since I didn't want to move out to where he was and he didn't want to go to where I was that it would be best if we just ended our relationship. WHen I asked why he said we would talk about it later. I didn't here a single word from him for 6 weeks, except for the screen shot message he sent me the next day about being friends. I cried myself to sleep everyday for about a month or so until I realized I can't make anyone stay with me if that's not what they want. When I finally heard back from him after a short hello, he said that he made a mistake and waanted to get back together. I cried. He asked me why I was crying, I told him I didn't want that anymore, not because I didn't love him but because those 6 weeks of solitude, sadness and a feeling of not being enough for the one man who told me he would love me forever, was sifted through, edited and saved away. I loved him but even if we got back together, how did I know I could trust him not to break my heat again, not to leave me again on a whim because things are not going his way.
I loved, I still love him and I will always love him; but the past is the past, I don't eat ice cream half way, throw it in the trash and take it back out to continue eating it. Once it's in the trash it's gone.