Dreams And Reality Poem by Melissa Joy Chesky

Darkness blankets my eyes,
I feel dazed,
Almost detatched...
And then I'm twisting into
A spinning vortex.

Spinning and spinning,
Round and round,
Then my feet are on the ground.
I was not in my bed,
I wasn't even in my room anymore.
I didn't know exactly where I was,
But I knew what was happening.
It was that kind of dream.

I was standing in front of him.
My hands started to sweat,
My head getting clammy.
Then he starts walking towards me,
I look around feverishly,
Not wanting him to see me like this,
All nervous and fidgety.
Too late though.

He grabs my hands,
Gently though,
Never hard enough to hurt.
He pulls me in close,
His warm hands on my back,
I hesitate,
But I give into his gentle,
Almost glowing eyes.

Then he does the unthinkable,
He leans in towards me,
I start to pull back thinking,
'Yeah right this is just a scam,
He would never fall for me, '
But my conscience says,
Go for it,
So I did.
I leaned in willingly,
A little scared but excited at the same time.

We start to get closer,
We're closing the gap between us,
Slowly but still...
He's so close to me
His smell overpowers me.

But then something else happens,
I hear my conscience saying,
No, no don't do it,
I ignore it,
And lean to him.
But an invisible hand pulls me
Away from him.
I was so close.
The figure of him is fading rapidly,
A look of confusion crosses his face.

Then, I am back in my bed,
The dream is gone,
Trapped in my unconsious mind.
The dream left only
A lump of longingness in my heart,
A handful of disappointment,
And a glistening tear escaping my eye,
Onto my cheek,
Then my arm,
Then soaking into my pajamas,
Too sad to catch it.

I lay back on my bed
Studying my almost white ceiling,
Exactly where I was before,
Except I'm wide awake,
Wondering what if...