Easter Term Report Poem by William Barton

Spring, this term,
Is quite up to the standard required by the Board,
Notwithstanding occasional periods of non-attendance.
Has been awarded a pass in the following: -
Suitable sunshine; average rainfall;
Together with a distinction in equinoctial turbulence.

Grass
In spite of early sets-back
Is maintaining considerable interest;
Has achieved correct height and shade.
In the summer term, however,
Will require considerable attention from shears and lawn mower.

Rose too
Merits an alpha plus for a brave show
Notwithstanding an adolescent rash of thorns;
Greenfly is to be regretted.
Must not let his enthusiasm wilt;
Must beware of the Bee stream.

Outstanding Daffodil
Alas, brilliant and blooming!
A budding exhibitioner at King's.
Forced unseasonably past his prime,
Now wastes his sweetness in public dance halls:
Now promotes soap.

Unselected Weeds
Appears to lack the classical mould;
Would do well to curb his extra-curricular activities
Would be far happier in some comprehensive compost.
Nevertheless, we are deeply sorry he is leaving,
And I, personally, wish him every success.