English Language As A Rocket Science Poem by alexander opicho

A teachers enters the class,
On a certain Kenyan afternoon,
‘Good afternoon class, ' shouts the teacher,
‘Good afternoon Mr. English, ' respond the pupils,
‘How are you all? ' The teacher poses,
‘We are fine thank you Mr. English, ' pupils respond,
‘How do you do? ' Continues the teacher,
‘We have done nothing so far only waiting for you, '
Pupils joyously howl back,
‘O! You are wrong; you don't answer like that, '
Intervenes the petrified teacher,
‘How were we to answer you teacher? '
Asks one pupil,
‘You were to answer how do you do, '
Retorts the teacher,
‘No! No! No! Mr. English,
it beats logic of our mother tongue, '
Interjects a pupil,
‘You cannot answer a question
by another question,
since we had done nothing,
se only tell you the truth,
that we had done nothing,
there was no need for us to ask you again,
how you have done or you are doing, '
Resist a pupil as all others laugh loudly,
‘But remember this is English language
not your native mother tongue
accept to follow grammatical rules, '
The teacher countermands,
‘But where is the logic of that greeting? '
Pupils inquire father,
‘Forget about it; let us go to your names, '
Teacher challenges,
‘Let each of you shout his name, '
Teacher demands,
Pupils; Wepukhulu! Kufwafwa! Netondo!
‘O! No, my pupils shout your good names,
you got from the Bible or from American movies,
Names like; Nick, Johny, Sussy, Tony and so on, '
Teacher demands,
‘But Mr.English if we lose our names,
And also lose our language,
Then what else are we left with? '
Pupil demands,
‘You will be left with knowledge and civilization, '
Responds the teacher,
‘Don't we have knowledge in our language? '
don't we have civilization in our names? '
‘We don't, knowledge is only in English, '
Responds the teacher,
‘Look at that tree out there,
it is called Baobab tree in English,
and that is knowledge, '
Directs the teacher,
‘But Mr. English, it is Kumukhonke tree,
in our language, it treats cerebral Malaria,
Is this knowledge or not? '
Questions the pupil,
‘that is not knowledge,
it is primitive culture,
that existed before Christ, '
Balks the teacher,
‘Do you mean it teacher? '
‘I mean it my pupils, '
‘Teacher, You mean Englishmen
are fountain of knowledge? '
‘Yes they are, remember Great Britain, '
No teacher, I have a contradiction,
English men were called barbarians,
By 10th century, they were Huns,
They were primitive and crude men,
From North of France,
Their primitivity made them to be chased away,
By the cultured Frenchmen,
They became banished Northmen,
Hence Norsemen,
Hence Nomarndy, then Normandy conquest
And then the birth of England,
Thus, England was born out of social misfits,
Cultural rejects from France;
Hence their imperial character,
But by that time of their barbarity,
Greeks were already modern,
Greeks had Homer and Aristotle and Plato,
Socrates and Sophocles for centuries,
The Chinese were already modern,
With public exam system in Confucius,
That is why Jesus and Paul spoke Greek,
But not English,
And even now English men are still primitive,
They have a hang-over for colonialism,
They have cultural respect for bombazine,
Primogeniture and Niyoka; or communal sex,
They have a queen in their politics,
A very shameful culture in a digital era,
They only perpetrate English language,
Out of a ploy for cultural Darwinism,
Over subaltern languages,
So that they can sell their books and movies,
They don't have respect for other languages,
Their language is a blend of other languages,
They do it on the funny pretext,
Of self-congratulatory neologism,
But if you, a non-native English speaker,
Happen to form an English word,
The way Okot P'Bitek formed Kwete,
And Taban Lo Liyong formed Payeukaring,
And Zirimu and Bukenya formed Oracy,
And Binyavanga formed Alawakubaring,
Then they will accuse you of ignorance,
Only to be healed through a grammar school
Found only in northern London,
But English is not complex language,
But French, Greek, Russian, Kiswahili are,
And even German, Lubukusu and Yoruba,
We would have had integral English
Or differential English, if it were,
Leo Tolstoy would have used it,
The way he used French with passion
In his Sevastopol and Felling of Wood,
English language is not rocket science,
It is not world class model culture,
It is a young language, European dialect,
In a need of more than a billion new words,
For it to perfect its communication use,
Greeks taught us one virtue of education,
Power to doubt the present,
But English is desperate for one thing;
Believe and obey, very stupid!
But education wants man to extol the self
In full swing of character and intelligence,
I rest my case with one respect,
We go out to search for history,
And age of the para-english word;
Bachelorette,